It's That Time of Year Again

Christmastime.

I keep asking myself when did the month of December get to be so busy.....and so stressful?  I keep thinking if there are some things I can stop doing to make it less so, but when I begin doing that, I feel guilty.  After all, this is supposed to be a time of giving and charity (love) to our fellow-man.  Right?  So much of that requires time, on my part.  Then there are obligations and some times I don't know if I'm coming, going, or just in some kind of alternate reality.  By the end of what I've come to call "Nutcracker Week" I'll be nearly comatose.  Factor in school activities/parties/and the drama class production of A Christmas Carol, and well, let's just say that it's no wonder I have a hard time keeping myself focused on Who the Reason for the Season is all about.  I do try!  Honestly.  Mostly through things that aren't what I label "busy work" like all the church stuff.  I get more joy from all of the non-church volunteer projects I've been involved in.  Sad.  But true.  I really don't think I "fit in" with the churchianity mentality, but I'm ok with that.

It's a sad fact.  It's bad enough when it's just the Nutcracker, but this year it's even more stressful due to too many things happening the same week.  My church has scheduled a Christmas concert on Thursday night, caroling on Friday night,  a youth Christmas breakfast on Sunday morning, a Christmas Cantata on Sunday night, a youth group Scavenger hunt on Monday morning, and the Pastor's Open House on Thursday night.  I think that's all.  I can't do it.  

When did "service" to Jesus become "activities?" In my opinion we'd do much more in Jesus' name if our church went to serve at the homeless shelter food kitchen.  Bleh!  I don't even like thinking like this, even though I truly believe that the church has left it's first love.  Our first love should be Christ, and Christ's first love was people....the poor, rejected, outcasts of the world.  He ran with the party crowd:  the whores, tax cheats, blue-collar redneck types, the diseased (lepers), those who were physically handicapped or blind, and the demon possessed...and if we have the love of Christ we should be ministering in a real hands-on way, to people.  I just don't think that singing in a cantata or being in a scavenger hunt is of the same merit as actually serving the kind of needy people Jesus ministered to.  Jesus always met their physical needs before meeting their spiritual needs. Satan has effectively quarantined the church; totally removed it from the society to which it's supposed to be the shining City on a Hill.  Sadly, we've bought it, hook, line, and sinker.  I can count on one hand (and still have fingers left over) the churches that I know who personally minister to the kind of people that society looks down on. Where do we get off with the idea that just because we "give money" or support to an organization, that THAT lets us off the hook to be the hands and feet of Jesus to the dregs of society?  Show me, please.

I don't really know how the Enemy has succeeded.  Perhaps what Bro. Rick says is right....we've had it too good for too long.  I recently read that people are drawn to dead churches because it makes them feel better about their own dysfunction.  Since when do we want to feel better about our dysfunction?  What I see is that there's a generation who doesn't understand the power of being addicted to a legitimate substance (Hebrews 11:1) and we waste our time burning for illegitimate things. Jesus was, IS, and forever will be, the most magnetic force humanity has ever experienced.  Has anyone else ever walked up to random strangers and said, "Come.  Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.", and perfectly sane men dropped their fishing nets and followed a man that they did not know?  Religiously cleansed Levitical priests didn't see who He was, but lepers did; the Sanhedrin didn't follow Jesus, but whores did. The Pharisees couldn't see who Jesus was, but blind men did....men who couldn't see anything knew that what they needed was passing them by as Jesus walked away.  And they followed Him.  How do blind men follow anything? Or anyone?  Yet they did. Right into a house of someone they didn't know.  Talk about crossing the societal standards on etiquette and propriety.  They were so desperate to be in His presence that they crossed the threshold of impropriety and societal mores.  Religion creates "lines" = what is acceptable and unacceptable.  Society doesn't mind if you're a Christian so long as you stay "inside" the lines.  That's the whole thing behind the bias against Tim Tebow.  He doesn't stay inside the "religious lines."  He crosses their lines each and every time he kneels to pray on the sidelines of a football field.  If he were practicing any other religion the bias and mockery would not be tolerated, nor accepted.  The difference is that Tebow's faith is in Jesus.  People who have encounters with religion will NEVER understand people who have had an encounter with Jesus.  Jesus.  He still intimidates and crosses the lines some 2000+ years later.  The moment our Christianity becomes confrontational, it in actuality becomes Christianity.  When our faith ceases to be confrontational we can take Christ out of the equation and it just becomes religion then.  How can you have a non-confrontational Christianity?  The essence of the entire concept is Christ:  the most controversial person in the history of the world.

I can only speak for myself, but I want more.  More Jesus.  I want to see Him work, not only IN me, but THRU me.   It's weird, but sometimes it's like I'm a Jesus junkie and I can't wait for the next high.  The more Jesus I get, the more I want.  I can't explain it, and I have to admit that I wish this was something I felt every day; it isn't.  Some days it's a plateau; others, a valley.  Yet, I know God has put me on this planet to engage in a game of Divine Tag! If what happened to me, happens to you, you'll get crazy too!  Tag!  You're IT!

L8R Dayz,

Starr

The Call on 11-11-11

On 11-11-11 in Detroit, Michigan, Lou Engle and The Call are hosting a 24 hour prayer vigil for Detroit, Michigan, and our country.  The prayer service begins at 6:00 p.m. and will continue until 6:00 p.m. tomorrow evening.  Having heard Lou Engle (via The Ramp) I know him to be outspoken in his stance against the Islamicization of America, unlike Pastors Rick Warren and Robert Schuller who have begun preaching a heretical form of the gospel of Christ known as Chrislam, a mixing of the Bible and the Koran.  So, it is not surprising to me that Council for Islamic Relations (CAIR) would be protesting this event.  This blog is in response to an article (link provided below) that I read and that I disagree with.  First is that the article implies that the Christians are going to become violent and target the mosques. I say “implied” because it says that the Muslim community is beefing up the security around their Mosques as if they are expecting something to happen. Muslims seem to forget that we are not the religion responsible for BEHEADING people who do not convert to Christianity. ‘Nuff said.

I support Lou Engle! It amazes me that so many Christians today don’t (or won’t) support any gathering such as this because it’s “confrontational” and may offend Muslims. Really? How can you claim to be a Christian then? How can you have a non-confrontational Christianity when the essence of the concept IS Jesus Christ? Jesus Christ IS absolutely the most controversial figure who has lived in the history of the world! If your brand of Christianity isn’t confrontational then it has ceased to be Christianity. If we’re going to preach a gospel that is less than radical then we need to eliminate the name of Christ entirely from our religious-speak. Christ was, and is, undoubtedly the most radical person humanity has ever experienced. The Pharisees couldn’t see who Jesus was, but blind men could; the Levitical priests didn’t follow Jesus, but fishermen and whores did. Jesus took 12 men and turned the known world upside-down and has been doing so for 2000+ years. The problem today is that we have taken the radical message of Jesus and quarantined it out of our society and confined it to within “the church building.” Where the NT church is to be a revolving door, equipping people to “live” out the message of Jesus and build His Kingdom within our communities, we have instead built great and glorious mega-churches (mini-Kingdoms) of our own and sacrificed our salt- and light-worthiness in the society in which we live.  Just my opinion.

This article also misrepresents (or at least takes out of context) Engle’s position on Christians “taking over government” or whatever in society. It all goes back to the word “Ecclesia” or “Ekklesia” and the responsibilities of that “solemn assembly” governing body. As most people know, the “ecclesia” is the translated word “church” (meaning the ‘called out ones’) in the Bible. What most people don’t know is that Ecclesia was also a principal governmental assembly in Athens, Greece; responsible for declaring war, military strategy, electing military generals and magistrates. Ecclesia or Ekklesia: meaning the “Called out of” is used 115 times in the NT and translated “church” in all but 3 verses. The practice of ecclesia had been in use 500 years by the time of Christ and had specific, well-acknowledged connotations. Peter understood ecclesia.

“Called out” ones to be the heavenly council above city council; rules over kings and govts that are renegade…governing body….word ecclesia changed to “church” and Joel 2:15 “a solemn assembly” uses the same word “ecclesia” in Gk Septuagint.

Ecclesia declares war on renegade elements of the society in which it assembles:
Ps110:1-2
2 Cor. 10:4
Eph 6:12

so it’s not like a “takeover” in the context in which this article implies, but spiritual warfare against the ungodly or Satanic elements in the society in which we live.

Til Next Time,

Starr

This blog is in response to the article listed here:  Muslims protest the 11-11-11 Prayer Event

Dictator of the Month Club

With the beginning of the Arab Spring earlier this year, it almost seems as if America has become a leading participant in the Dictator Of The Month club.  The recent assassination of Osama bin Laden by Seal Team 6,  and the demise of Anwar al-Awlaki by Predator Drone,  seem to support my premise.  I find it ironic that President Obama ran on a platform of ending the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, yet in the time since the beginning of the Arab Spring he has sent troops into Libya and, as of this past week, Uganda.  What are we becoming???  The NATO thugs?  When the President sent troops into Libya, he totally bypassed Congress in the process.  As a result of our presence there the latest Dictator to meet his untimely death is Libya's Muammar Qaddafi.  According to one report, his entourage was fired upon by Predator Drone, whereupon he exited his vehicle and ran to a drainage underpass.  He was shot in both legs.  Al Jazeera released video showing Qaddafi just minutes before he was shot in the head.  The video and pictures are graphic.  Below is just one such example.  WARNING:  Graphic!

It still puzzles me that pictures of bin Laden were not released.  I think I would have felt major validation and justification in viewing those pictures....much the same as I did when Saddam Hussein was hanged.  Qaddafi always reminded me of Scar from the Disney movie, The Lion King.  I'm not sure why, but maybe the EVIL persona had something to do with it.  While I feel little remorse on the death of this evil man, my concern is that someone of an even more vile nature will rise up to take his place.  Isn't that the usual way of things?  Egypt's Hosni Mubarak was ousted and he sought asylum elsewhere.  Probably a good thing he left the country or he would have met a similar fate to that of Qaddafi.  

The political game of foreign policy is skewered at best.  I mean, we spent millions of American taxpayer dollars to support these regimes back in the 70's, 80's, and 90's.  We provided them with our technology, military equipment, etc., and for what?  Just so we could kill them a few decades later, leaving the entire Middle East in upheaval and unrest, a plum ripe for the picking to the next, worst evil dictator to come along!  I can honestly say, "What's wrong with this picture?"

I  truly believe God is in control of all things; He is the master planner.  There is nothing that happens that surprises Him.  He isn't sitting in heaven, wringing his hands, with a worried brow.  It seems that all of this unrest in the Middle East, the resurgence of anti-Israel sentiment and anti-Semitic attitudes prevalent all over the world are leading up to the end time events described in Daniel, Ezekiel, and the book of Revelation.  I am not a prophet; have never claimed to be, but I can read.  Interestingly enough, is that lately I've been reading the Qur'an.  I have such a clear and concise concept of how those events are going to unfold.  My spiritual eyes have been opened.  Not that they were closed, but even with reading and understanding something is far different than in seeing or conceptualizing how those events come to pass.

Fact:  the three major mono-theistic religions of Judaism, Christianity, and Islam all have their foundation in the person of Abraham and his sons Isaac and Ishmael.   Judaism and Christianity from Isaac; Islam from Ishmael and the sons of Keturah.  The center for all three religions is Jerusalem.  God promised to make both Isaac and Ishmael great nations.  But only Isaac was the son of promise, the line of the Messiah.  Ishmael was banished, along with his mother Hagar, and eventually married an Egyptian woman.  All of the ancient peoples of Edom, Moab, and Ammon are descendents of Ishmael. Abraham had other sons by his concubine Keturah. It is from her that the Arabs are descended. We know them today as Iraq, Iran, Syria, and Persia.  Isaac was the father of Esau and Jacob.  Jacob later became known as Israel and this is the line of modern day Israel.   In reading the end time events and those leading up to Daniel's 70th week, we are introduced to people who will play a major role as those prophetic events unfold.  Do I know who they are?  No.  Do I know the exact time when they will happen?  No.  Nut job Harold Camping has predicted the end of the world....again.  This time it's for tomorrow, October 21, 2011.  His previous prediction was in May of this year.  Yet, Mr. Camping will be proven a false prophet again, tomorrow.  The Bible is clear, without room for conjecture.  No one knows the day nor the hour; it will come as a thief in the night.  

That isn't to say that we can't be aware of events taking place at a rapid pace.  We can see those quite literally with our own two eyes.  All we have to do is turn on Fox News or CNN and run the current events through our prophetic scriptural eyes and we can SEE it happening right in front of us!  Prior to reading the Qur'an, I always wondered how such events would unfold.  How would so many people be deceived and believe a lie?  How would so many come to accept the Mark of the Beast in their foreheads and/or hands?  How would the nations of the world NOT recognize Christ as the Messiah when he returns?  All of those questions are answered in the Qur'an.  I know, weird!  Right?  The Qur'an is like a photographic negative to the Bible....similar but diametrically opposed.  The Qur'an speaks of the Madhi and recognizes him as their savior.  I find it astounding that this Madhi guy has many of the same characteristics as that of the Antichrist as depicted in the book of Revelation.  The Madhi comes in a time of worldwide chaos, and establishes a false peace with Israel; he causes people to receive a mark in their heads or hands to show that they are the *true* believers, and he beheads those who do not convert; he leads the armies of the world against the One who returns on a white horse and makes war with the One whom he calls the "false Jesus" when in reality, that One on the white horse is the TRUE Jesus! The religion of Islam is setting Muslims up to be the agents of the end time events and they will believe they are doing God's (or Allah's) will.  It's mind boggling when you begin comparing the two.  We now have the movement of Chrislam overtaking evangelical churches in America.  America will not be exempt from the judgment on the nations.  Chrislam is the tool that will facilitate the one world religion and be instrumental in the emergence of the Antichrist on the secular, political, and ecumenical scenes.  When you have Pastors such as Rick Warren and Robert Schuller embracing this false theology and then propagating it to their mega-congregations, you have to KNOW that this isn't going to end well for the sheep in their flock.  They are great examples of what Jesus called a "wolf in sheeps clothing."

In closing, of the three monotheistic religions of Judaism, Christianity, and Islam, only one recognized Jesus as the Messiah.  Only One claimed to be the Son of God and gave His life to prove He was who He said He was.  Only One claimed to be The Way, The Truth, and The Life.  There is no Plan B.  Jesus was either who He said He was, or He was the biggest fraud in the History of Mankind.  He either suffered and died as an atonement for us, the propitiation of our sin, or He suffered the most horrendous, horrific death imaginable as a Poser!  If you can believe Homer wrote the Odyssey, or that Plato wrote The Republic, why is it so hard to believe the account of Jesus, as told by eyewitnesses and first-hand accounts?  Primary sources we call them today.   These Primary Sources were holed up in the upper room following the crucifixion.  These scaredy-cats were afraid they were going to be next on the crucifix agenda!  Yet something happened within that first 72 hours that changed these cowards into Bold men of God who turned the known world upside down! Not only that, they too, died a martyrs death!  Why?  What happened to change them so?  They saw Someone, walked with Him, ate with Him, touched Him for 40 days!  Then went and told others what they had Seen and Heard!  So much so that the religious leaders of their day sought to kill them!   When Stephen is stoned, a man by the name of Saul stood and watched.  His mission to kill as many Christ-followers as possible!  Until he met Someone on the road, that is!  After meeting Jesus, Saul became Paul...a NEW creation in Christ.  God is a Seeker.  He sought Adam in the Garden; he left the 99 to seek the lost sheep; He sought Paul on the road to Damascus.  God loves for us to emulate Him and seek Him.  Real seeking always produces Real Finding!  If you aren't finding then it's time to re-evaluate your seeking.  He draws near to those who draw near to Him and He will always be found by those who Seek Him.  Don't delay.

Pondering,

Starr

Scarlett O'Hara on Occupy Wall Street

The Communist Party endorses OWS. The Nazi Party endorses OWS. Now, President Obama endorses OWS.

"Show me your friends and I'll show you your future." ~Bill Cosby

As history has shown, this never ends well for people. Consider these facts:

"That secularism is more dangerous to a society than any specific religious faith is statistically verifiable. For example, even though tens of millions of lives have been lost at the hands of numerous religious faiths over the past two thousand years (and most of those have indisputably been lost at the hand of Islam), the number of lives lost at the hands of secular governments in just the twentieth century alone is many times greater. For example, there were the 62 million killed by Soviet Communists; the 35 million by Chinese Communists; the 1.7 million by the Vietnamese Communists; the 1.6 million in the Polish Ethnic Cleansing; the 1 million in Yugoslavia; the 1.7 million in North Korea, etc.

Furthermore, the number of deaths perpetrated by individual secular leaders is enormous. For example, Joseph Stalin was responsible for the murder of 42.7 million; Mao Tse-tung, 37.8 million; Hitler, 20.9 million; Vladimir Lenin, 4 million; Pol Pot of the Khmer Rouge, 2.4 million; Yahya Khan, 1.5 million; and numerous others could be listed. Significantly, secularism killed more in one century than did all religions combined in the previous twenty."  ~Courtesy of David Barton, Wall Builders

In light of the above horrifying statistics, these 20-somethings that Stalin would have labeled "Useful Idiots" (google it!) will be eaten alive!  These are the kids who have had everything they've ever wanted handed to them on the proverbial silver platter or were born with the proverbial golden spoon in their mouths.  They are protesting their student loans to Ivy League colleges that cost more than what my humble abode is worth!  Where is the justification in that?  If anything, they should be protesting outside those hallowed halls of liberal learning instead of the banks who gave them the student loans in the first place!  After all, the banks didn't MAKE them take out those loans...it was their own personal choice.  Education is not a RIGHT, it is a privilege.

They keep trying to compare the OWS protests to Tahirir Square in Egypt.  There is no such comparison.  These kids have never lived under the oppressive rule of a dictator.....yet!  They have never missed a meal, whereas the Egyptian people were starving!  There was no food in Egypt!  They couldn't run out to the local convenience store on the corner to buy a loaf of bread or gallon of milk.  What do these kids think is going to happen if/when the system collapses?  What will they do when they can't get to their ATM's?  Let's not forget that these are the same kids who grew up with Participation Trophies and the 10-run rule in Little League baseball.  So maybe they're all about getting a Participation Trophy now?  I don't know about that, but some are getting 20 pts extra credit from their institutions of higher learning for attending an OWS protest.  When life is lived in the herd mentality, exceptionalism and ingenuity die a slow and painful death.  

When socialist, communist principles become the law of the land, the quality of life and standard of living is always lower for the people as a general rule.  In this homogenous, pasteurized world no one in school will make A's, B's, D's, or F's.  The A's give their extra points to the F's and the B's to the D's and the result is a bunch of mediocre C's!  These people are going to open their eyes to a rude awakening!  In all of the interviews I've seen of the OWS, one of the most ironic is the one where the reporter is asking all these people to tell why they are protesting.  One hippy chick says we should go back to the hunter/gatherer lifestyle.  Really?  These kids will starve!  The reporter then asks, "oh, is that an iPhone you're using?"  Funny, huh?  Yeah, these people have the same love affair that I have with my iPhone and iPod (the new iPhone 4S sales hit 4 million in 3 days of it's release) yet they are protesting the Capitalist system that made that technology and ingenuity possible.  Unbelievable! 

What these people don't seem to realize is that if/when our system collapses, it's going to be THOSE people who are eliminated first.  I have always said, somewhat tongue in cheek, that I am "American by birth, Southern by the Grace of God!"  In light of recent events, I affirm that statement with every breath I take and every bone in my body!  For the same reasons that the South lost the War Between The States, the South will be one of the few places where we know how to survive what is seemingly looming on the horizon.  We've already lived thru Reconstruction.  Scarlett O'Hara taught us that in the Deep South, women learn at a young age that when the world is falling apart around you, it's time to tear down the drapes and make a new dress!  Our agrarian culture will be to our benefit.  We still grow our food, our Mama's taught us canning and how to dehydrate for food storage. We can sew, crochet, and knit. Our men still hunt & fish.  We know how to survive!  Do you really think that those people on OWS would still be there if there weren't others who were doling out food for them?  If they were having to go hungry, do you think they'd really still be 3 weeks into protest?  No!  Not to mention that the Working Families Party (just one of the unions supporting this) is paying $650/week to people to protest!  That's more than what many people make in a week doing an honest days' work!  Sad, but true!

 

They spit on our troops, thereby trampling underfoot the blood spilled by those same soldiers who died to give them the right to protest in the first place!  In my opinion, these people should renounce their American citizenship and get  the hell out of Dodge!  They should live in Russia, Cuba, Iran, Saudi Arabia, Venezuela, N. Korea, or China for a while.  Perhaps then they would have a greater appreciation for what our men and women of the armed forces have lived and died for in our country's 235 years.  Perhaps they would not take their freedom for granted.  Then again, with the Zombie mentality they have exhibited so far, maybe not. 

Later dayz,

~Starr

A New Beginning

From the poisoning of our trees,
by a man with a poisoned mind.

To the trail of mass destruction
that April’s Fury left behind.

Our Auburn family has pulled together
to face adversity head on.

And extended our hands to our brothers
so that healing can go on!

We have bid a farewell to familiar faces
and are anxious to meet the new...

Who will proudly wear the Jerseys
of Auburn's Fearless Orange and Blue!!

On Saturday, at Jordan-Hare
Another football season will begin.

Some things may be different,
But still, "All We Do Is Win!!!"

We are The National Champions!
We will put Utah's Big Blue in their place!

We are The Courageous Auburn Tigers!
And we are back in the race!!!

WAR EAGLE!!!

Poetic Tiger

September 3, 2011

 

Life in the Rearview

Whoever said that life isn't a bed of roses, lied. Life is exactly like a bed of roses: full of the beautiful fragrance and vibrant vitality of life, interwoven with the bittersweet memories of remembrance, and thorns along the way to remind us that we're "not all that" and it's not all about us. 

It's funny, (though 'funny' isn't the best word to use, I'm not sure how else to describe it), how God can take a horrendous, destructive act of nature, and even in the midst of suffering, pain, and the "OMG! What do I do now?" feelings and turn it into a blessing in disguise. Seriously. 

The tornadoes that ravaged my fair state for 24 hours on April 27th spawned more than death and destruction. In the aftermath, I've seen a community knit closer together; the spirit of charity and love rekindled; perfect strangers reaching out to help; pastors and youth ministers rolling up their sleeves and doing hard labor alongside the roughest beer-drinking rednecks you'll ever see (this IS Alabama!). I've seen churches being the hands and feet of Jesus, sheltering the now homeless, the orphaned, and providing for the broken and downhearted, ministering to their souls and restoring their spirit.

Following the poisoning of the oak trees at Toomer's Corner in Auburn by Harvey Updyke, an Alabama Crimson Tide fan, you'd think you'd never see the day when an Auburn fan would reach out to a *insert aghast stage whisper here* Bammer! Yet following the reports of the near annihilation of Tuscaloosa, and whadaya get? The Toomer's  For Tuscaloosa Facebook page mobilizing Auburn fans nationwide to help. And help we have! Miracles in shoe leather, a strong back, and a willingness to help. More than just willingness; it's more like a gut-wrenching need that you can't control. I know. I've felt it. 

The morning following, I was consumed by the feeling that I had to "do something!" I didn't know what.....just SOMETHING to help in any way I could! As a result, I've experienced a lot of "firsts," but I shall leave that for another day, as this post has taken on a life of it's own and is headed in a different direction than it's original intent....a result, not surprising, I suppose, considering the rambling way my mind diverges in the blink of an eye from one random thought to another.  But I digress. 

Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs. Some people believe faith is a crutch for "weak, uneducated dumbasses" (new blog about this is in the works too!). Yet,  as a person of faith, I wonder how people "without faith" get thru tragedies of Biblical proportion such as this and retain their sanity? I use the term "without faith" loosely, because, in reality, everybody has faith; the only difference is the Object of our faith.

There were 47 tornadoes in Alabama on April 27, 2011, including 5 EF-3, 9 EF-4 and 1 EF-5.   To put it in perspective, if you add up the  lengths of all the tornadoes we had in Alabama on April 27th, we had 1165 MILES of damage....roughly the driving distance from Montgomery, Alabama to Toronto, Canada. (0_o)

I've seen, with my own eyes, the destruction from Sand Mountain, Shoal Creek, Ohatchee, and Eclectic. I recognized names on the list of those who had died, all the way from Pisgah, Bryant, and Flat Rock in northeast Alabama to Eclectic in south-central Alabama.  I can't speak for everyone, nor all communities, but this tragedy has made my community, my state, more of a family. The walls and barriers of race, religion, and even college football affiliation, have been breached as we have come together to recover from this disaster.

I broke down in tears at the Elementary school when I saw the black ribbons on the doors for the little girl who had been killed the night of the storm.  At the Middle School I sobbed during the Awards Ceremony as the husband of a science teacher sang "I Will Praise You In The Storm".   I cried with a friend of long years who had lost so much materially, but the Lord preserved her treasure in earthen vessels and her faith has kept her strong for her family. I saw this same tiny woman brave the hoards of FEMA and refuse government assistance, vehemently and loudly, to about 20 people, vocally proclaiming her faith as she continues to trust God for provision and direction.

I cried in thankfulness that my Mama was kept safe while the three houses next to hers were demolished. I have cried until I have no tears left....just dry wracking sobs shaking my body. I had a hard time, trying to wrap my mind around it all. Mentally trying to process and compartmentalize it  just seemed an overwhelming task. Unfathomable.

Now that I'm looking at the events of 27 April in the rearview,  I've come away with a stronger faith in God and an even deeper realization that God is good, all the time. While in the midst of terrible tragedy, He still blesses us above and beyond what we deserve. He reaches out to us through the words and actions of His people and He puts us in the lives of others who come alongside us in times of tragedy who may not know Him personally, to initiate a game of Divine Tag.  I WILL praise Him in the storms life hurls my way! To do less would be that of the most reprehensible ingratitude.. 

L8R Dayz,

Starr

Throw Momma From The Train

While waiting for Jacob to finish his All-star baseball practice today, I chose to chillax with a sweet tea at Mickey D's. I began reading an article in the local paper about people lining up for the 60 courtroom seats in the Casey Anthony trial. Puhleeze!!!

Somebody tell me what's wrong with THIS picture??? I mean, here are people who are coming out as early as 1 a.m. to get a place in line!!! I just don't see how making this tragedy a spectacle is beneficial to society AT ALL! A court spokeswoman actually said that they had considered lottery tickets! For real!!  (0_o) What's this world coming to?

First, this is a horrible incident. The life of a precious little girl was snuffed out by her no-account Mama. Yes, she's claiming it was an accidental drowning in the bath tub, but really....who believes that?  I don't. 

Secondly, there are grandparents and other family members to consider. Imagine with me, if you can, the horror they must feel KNOWING that their own child is capable of this kind of atrocious act. I have a hard time wrapping my mind around it. I just cannot fathom, for the life of me, how a mother could be so selfish and self-absorbed, that she could, or would, take the life of her own child. As frustrating as motherhood and parenting can sometimes be, there are innumerable blessings that far outweigh the trials of parenthood.  I just don't know how one arrives at that decision.

Thirdly, I'm just gonna say it. Speak my mind loud and clear, as to why it is so seemingly easy for people such as Casey Anthony to kill her own child. Thank you, Rowe v. Wade! Is it surprising that more crimes against children have occurred since it's passage in 1973? If the life of a child is not valued while in the womb, is it any wonder that it's worthless after birth? Everyone is A-Ok with killing the most innocent victims. No one wants to take responsibility for their actions. Abortion is the ONLY "viable" choice for the pro-abortion crowd. The words "viable" and "abortion" should never be used in the same sentence. It is an oxymoron. Viable means "life" and abortion means "death." Abortion is cruel and inhumane on every visceral level.

In this case, I think it's time to Throw Momma From the Train!!! Casey Anthony deserves the death penalty, and nothing less. As for the would-be spectators, they should be ashamed of themselves for making this tragedy a public spectacle and courtroom circus!

Ah, well....that's my rant for the day. 

L8R Dayz, 

Starr

Jazz Fest 2011

Jazz Fest at The Amp is gonna be awesome!  Not only is the weather perfect......the breeze from the lake is balmy and scented with all of the decadent Southern aromas of magnolia, mimosa, gardenia, and honeysuckle.....the music is gonna be fine! Some of the featured blues/jazz musicians are: Randall Bramlett Band, Geoff Achison and the Souldiggers (from Austrailia), and JJ Grey and Mofro. The only band I've heard before is the Randall Bramlett Band. He was here a couple of years ago, when Joe Bonamassa was the headliner. 

I'm writing this while waiting for Jaala to get a funnel cake....and it's taking forever!  I'm also barefooted....yup, shoeless Starr, because the strap on my new white sandals (that I just bought this morning) broke within less than 5 minutes of being here. After all that harping by Jaala about me not wearing shoes that matched....and when I finally found a pair of white ones that I actually liked.....well, nuff said. 

The funniest thing, is that my Mama called me soon after Randall Bramlett came on to play. I kept telling her to hold on, I couldn't hear...and she hung up on me anyway. In a few seconds she called back. By that time I had walked far enough away from the music, so I could hear her. She asked me what "all that racket" was and then she  said she called to tell me that the Jazz Fest was this weekend and that I should go.  She had seen it advertised in a paper. When I told her that I was here and  it was why I couldn't hear her earlier, she laughed. :) So did I. 

Jaala Rose didn't think she'd see anyone she knew, but as soon as we got parked, she leaned over to whisper that the girl who'd just gotten out of another car was the most annoying girl at school. Then when we got in the shuttle to take us up to the Amp, the girl sat in the seat in front of us. I asked Jaala if that was the girl she had told me about, and she looked at me, and with pursed lips, shushed me...like she was the parent shushing a child who talks out loud about the fat lady at the grocery store or the kid picking his nose at Mickey D's! (0_o)

I've seen several people that I know, met some new people, and am thoroughly enjoying the blues music.  Jazz Fest has been an event, much like En Fuego, that I've come to enjoy and look forward to each year. I missed Jazz Fest last year because I was with my Mom, taking her to the doctor.  I've seen Joe Bonamassa, Susan Tedeschi, Derek Trucks, and the Zac Brown Band here at Jazz Fest.

Jaala Rose just now came out of the funnel cake line, so we're off to hear some sweet, summer blues music!

Later summer days,

Starr

Journey

 

Mom: First Day of Chemotherapy & Radiation

As many of you know, it's been awhile since I've posted on this blog page. The neglect has been, in part, due to the fact that I have been on a Journey with my Mom. A Journey Through Cancer. Cancer is such a debilitating and immoral disease. I say that because it's almost like a person (in this case, my Mom) loses her humanity and becomes a lab rat. Seriously. If there's anything I hate about what my Mom is enduring, it's the fact that she has become just another statistic in the health care system and is someone to be "experimented" on. I suppose that's why they call it "practicing" medicine?

Our journey began in October 2009 when a spot was found on Mom's right lung. On March 24, 2010 Mom saw the oncologist again, and on April 7th she had another PET scan. On April 21, 2010 Mom went for the follow-up visit and was told that she was not a candidate for chemo & radiation, and after being made to walk down a flight of stairs and up again (which she could not do since she also has COPD, is on oxygen, and also has a defib) she was told she was not a candidate for surgery to remove the STAGE 1 tumor on her lung. We (my brother, sister, and I) were all heartbroken at the news, as you can imagine.

You see, Mom has not smoked in 19 years. She was diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma in 1992. My dad passed away in 1998, also a victim of lung cancer. However, dad smoked right up until the time of his death, never had COPD, and truly was the picture of health until the diagnosis, after which his health deteriorated rapidly and within just a few months, he died. This was not a journey I expected to travel with my Mom...considering that she has not smoked in 19 years. Life can become brutal within a matter of minutes, and your whole world can be knocked off of it's axis in mere seconds....the time it takes to draw a breath or blink an eye.

Now back to my Mom.....

In June 2010 the oncologist (Dr. Derek Holland, Memorial Hospital, Chattanooga, TN) suggested a procedure called RFA, which stands for Radio-Frequency Ablation, as the only viable option for treating Mom's cancer. It is a process where they use a needle to target the tumor with radiation....kind of like microwaving the cancer if you will. Mom complied and had the procedure done in July 2010. By the initial reports, we were told that the procedure was effective. I was with Mom when her doctor told her that it was successful. Less than two weeks later, on August 10th, Mom was admitted into the hospital where she stayed for 20 days and then another week at Siskin Rehab. Apparently the procedure was "overly" effective, as it had been so strong it had damaged some of the good lung tissue. The phrase used when we were told was that it had "burned a hole" in Mama's lung.

Fast forward to October 27, 2010: Mama got good news on her lung and thyroid. The tumor seemed to be smaller/better, and the thyroid was a non-issue...nothing wrong with Mom's thyroid. However, from the latest PET scan, it seems there is a lymph node in Mama's chest that may be affected and she would have to have another biopsy. The biopsy was scheduled for November, 22, 2010. Mama canceled the biopsy because that was the Monday before Thanksgiving and she wanted to "have Thanksgiving" with her family. The biopsy was rescheduled for December. It too was canceled due to inclement weather....snow, and travel down the mountain was impossible. The biopsy was rescheduled and canceled again, due to another winter storm, on January 10, 2011. Mom finally had the biopsy January 24th. After seeing the oncologist on February 24th, Mom got the results from the biopsy and the news was not good. The lung tumor was now a STAGE 3 and one lymph node (cluster) in her chest also had cancer cells. I was devastated. I was now faced with something that will forever change the world as I know it....a world without my Mother in it.

A Consuming Fire....

Those are the only words I can think of to describe the medical merry-go-round of chemotherapy and radiation that my Mom has been on since March. After being told that she was not a candidate for chemo & radiation, that is exactly the treatment that Mom has been subjected to for the past seven weeks.

Week 1: Mom had her first round of chemotherapy and radiation on March 7, 2011. Prior to administering the chemo, they gave her Benadryl. From what we were told, it's to preempt any allergic reactions that she may have to the chemotherapy. The Benadryl made Mom hyperactive....she couldn't sit still, rocked back and forth, scratched her legs and arms, and talked non-stop for the entire 3 hour process.

Mom: Cheetos & Sandwich for Lunch

Week 2:  Coincided with Spring Break, so Jacob, Jed, and Jaala Rose were with me when it came time for me to take Mom for chemo/radiation. Sophie, my Balinese cat, made the trip with us.  Mom had lost 2 pounds since last week.  On Moncay, March 14, 2011, at Mom's appointment with Dr. Holland, her oncologist, I mentioned to him that Mom had an adverse reaction to the Benadryl.  Dr. Holland then cut the Benadryl dose to half of what it had been the week before and prescribed Ataivan to relax her.  I didn't know it at the time, but My Mom + Ativan = Chaos!!! I am not entirely sure what happened exactly. I don't know if the dosage was too high or if my Mom is just super-sensitive to that type of drug, but the resultant behavior was scary to behold.  Mom was acting like she was sloshed. She couldn't walk. She would just stagger to the bathroom. She could not talk: her words were slurred and incomprehensible. She kept wanting to get up from the chemo chair to go get in her bed. There was no bed and we were not at home.  She didn't remember me from one minute to the next. She had no recollection of Jacob, Jed, or Jaala Rose sitting with her 30 minutes at a time. She didn't remember eating her food AND my food. Later, when I teased her about eating my St. Paddy's Day cookie, she accused me of lying about it, even though Jaala witnessed the even. A nurse even came by and scolded Mom to stop eating and to go to sleep. It was a scary day! I've never seen my Mom in such a way. I called the doctor and talked to his nurse. I was then told that Mom had been given  "DOUBLE DOSE" of Ativan. The only conclusion I can come to about this is that two separate nurses had put the Ativan into her IV. This has to be, to date, one of the MOST stressful days of my entire life!!! Not to say it didn't have it's own peculiar blessings, because it did. The Westside Baptist Church in Chattanooga provided sandwiches, chips/cheetos, cookies, and bottled water for all of the cancer patients and their families.  It was such a relief to know that I didn't have to leave my Mom to go and get food for her, the kids, or myself.  I was profoundly thankful to that body of believers who put "unto the least of these" into practice.  On Thursday, Dr. Rice, the radiologist, prescribed a Zpak for Mom. She had a low-grade fever and was coughing up a lot of phlegm. On Friday, Mom and I took the kids to eat at Bea's Restaurant. They were at first amazed at the huge lazy Susan and the huge array of food, but then they loved it.  Mom wasn't feeling well, but she was a trooper!

 

Mom at Bea's Restaurant  

 

 

 

 

 

Week 3: My brother, Kevin, took Mom for chemo & radiation. After talking to the doctor, it was decided to just give Mom the half dose of Benadryl. No Ativan. Since then, she has been almost normal during chemo & radiation. She still has moments where she seems to be forgetful, but for the most part, she seems to be sound of mind. Dr. Holland put Mom on a stronger antibiotic, Levaquin, for 5 days. Her co-pay was $60 for this medication. Unreal!Week 4: Mom began losing her hair, though it is minimal at this point. She had gained back her 2 pounds. I think it's all of the Waffle House and Huddle House food she and Kevin eat when he takes her to the doctor.

Mom: Losing her hair & Ringing The Bell

Week 5: Kevin took Mom this week, April 4 - 9, without any complications. Mom seems to be feeling better. Or she's just faking it. I don't know. Kevin took Mom to the Mary Ellen Locher Breast Cancer and she picked out a wig. He said she wanted one that was multi-colored brown with red in it, but he had her pick out one that looked the most like her own hair. I laughed, but I told him he should have let Mom get the one she wanted....that she'd probably been a wanna-be-red-head her whole life and what better time to wear a red wig and get away with it! :) It's not about him; it's about Mama! He told me he should have let me take her, and I agree....he should have!  

Week 6: My turn again; this time without the kids. They are back in school and I couldn't, in good conscience, take them out for a whole week. Sophie, once again, made the trip with me. On Monday when Mom had the lab work done, her blood count was low and she had lost 2 pounds again. She weighed 148.4. We had to wait an hour before they started the chemo. This was the absolute longest day ever! We were both exhausted by the time we got home. There were just a few instances where Mom didn't know me or didn't recognize me until she was right up on me. She didn't recognize me when she came out of the bathroom, even though I was sitting right by her chemo chair....right where I'd been when she got up to go potty. She also seems disoriented when we go into the hospital; she doesn't seem to know where she is supposed to go.

 

Mom with Me at Roy's Grill, Rossville, Blvd, Chattanooga, TN

On Tuesday, after Mom had radiation, we had a couple of hours to burn until her appointment with Dr. Sowell, her primary care physician. Mom wanted to eat lunch at Bea's Restaurant, so I drove down Dodd's Avenue only to discover that Bea's is not open on Monday & Tuesday! I drove to Rossville Boulevard and Mom pointed out a retro-50's diner called Roy's Grill. She told me that when she was a young woman living in Chattanooga back in the 50's that she caught the bus at the corner and that she had eaten supper at Roy's Grill every evening. So, we decided to eat there.  It was like walking back in time to the 50's. Everything was still in that 50's decor! I loved it! Both of us ordered a BLT with homemade potato chips. We shared a slice of chocolate pie, and it was not as good as the ones my Mama made, primarily because they served it with cool whip instead of meringue! While we were eating, a random guy came in, sidled up to the bar, and sat on the stool next to Mama....and the next thing I know, he's eating her potato chips and sharing his onion rings with her.  I lie not. Now I know who it is I get the "food-sharing" from. His name was Bill. My Mom never meets a stranger. 

Mom and her cat Lucy, aka Lucyfurr

Wednesday, after radiation, we drove home because the nurse was coming and Lucy (Mom's Siamese cat from hell) had an appointment at the vet. Mom went with me to take Lucy & Sophie. Lucy had to get her rabies shot and her "devil claws" trimmed. Sophie just had a nail trim. Lucy hates Sophie with a feline passion. I'm sure it's because she's used to being an only cat. Sophie is the best kitty ever. She just stays in the bedroom with me and ignores Lucy the best she can. Of course, I suppose it helps that she's mostly blind, but she never sees Lucy coming, which, in my opinion is a bad thing.

Thursday, Mom and I finally made it to Bea's. Mom ate like a little piggy! She had 4 ribs, a piece of chicken, new potatoes, cole slaw, potato salad, and two helpings of turnip greens....and two helpings of peach cobbler. The only thing Mama didn't eat was the bbq! Needless to say, we both went into a food coma when we got home!

Mama's Triple Scoop Lemon Custard Ice Cream at Mr. T's, Tiftonia, GA

Friday, Mom decided she wanted ice cream. After radiation I drove to St. Elmo's to Mr. T's....a little pizza and ice cream parlor at the foot of Lookout Mountain. It's the ONLY place to find Mom's favorite flavor of ice cream - Lemon Custard! I helped Mom to a table inside and then got in line to order our ice cream. As usual while standing in line, I begin a conversation with the lady in front of me. Turned out that she was there with a group from a Christian school in Chickamauga. After hearing that Mom had just come from treatment, she and the other moms there, allowed me to move ahead in line. She told me that they had "one" there that each of them had carried to treatment. She was speaking of one of the moms present, who was wearing a pink ball cap, and whose hair was just the lightest of fuzz on her head. I thanked them all and told them what a blessing it was to just randomly meet people who went out of their way to be kind. I ordered Mom's double dip Lemon Custard ice cream in a regular cone; I got the same thing in a waffle cone...but Mom's cone was twice the size of mine! She ate the whole thing! And then wanted pizza! So I had to order us a small pizza AFTER eating the ice cream! :) We left Mr' T's just as it began raining and drove through the historical scenic district of St. Elmo. Mom told me that she had lived there "back in the day" on Tennessee Avenue. She didn't remember the exact house; only that it was "on the right," and I didn't drive down the entire length of the street. Mom was ready to go home. We drove over the foot of Lookout Mountain and caught I-24 at Tiftonia....by then it was pouring rain! The terrible storms were coming in with a vengeance! When it was all said and done there were about 242 tornadoes (35 in Alabama and 62 in North Carolina alone!) ranging from Oklahoma, Arkansas, Mississippi, Alabama, and North Carolina, killing over two dozen people. So sad!

Mama ate the ENTIRE Ice Cream Cone!

Saturday: I had to get back home in time to take Jed to his ball game. I am always sad when I leave my Mom; I always wonder if it will be the last time I see her, and I always pray that it isn't. She told me that she would miss me; I told her that my brother and sister would be there tomorrow....and she told me it wasn't the same....then she paused and said, "You'll be here with me next week." I looked at her quizzically....and reminded Mom that my brother and sister would be here. She said, "Yes, but I'll call her Starla the whole time she's here." Now what do you do with that? I just laughed!

Week 7: April 18-22. Mom finishes up her chemotherapy and radiation this week. Mom got her "crown" with pink sequins on Monday, and will ring the bell on Thursday after her final radiation treatment. In 6 weeks she will have another PET scan that will, hopefully, tell us that the treatment has been successful.

Mom in her Pink Crown!

Please remember my Mom in prayer; her name is Dora.

~Starla

***UPDATE: Mom's treatment was effective. She is now in remission and "cancer free." Her hair is beginning to come back and it's the strangest thing. Mom's hair (see first picture) was a black and straight as could be prior to the chemo/radiation. Afterwards it turned as gray as could be. All of the black hair fell out, leaving little wisps of gray on her scalp. You can see the color difference in the picture where she is ringing the bell. Now that her hair is coming back, it is still black, but it is curly!!! It looks like she's gotten a perm!!! When I find the picture of her pulling at her curls, I'll upload it after this so you can see the difference. It is so pretty! Mom still does not have a lot of gray hair. I hope that is one trait I share with my Mom too.

Why Men Prefer Dogs

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

4. A dog's parents never visit.

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.

7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"

10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.

11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.

13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.

14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.

All in fun, so I hope my manly men readers will not be offended!  

Later dayz, 
 ~Starr stuff

Men 101

1. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers.

2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.

3. Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

4. Go for the younger man. You might as well, they never mature anyway.

5. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.

6. Men are all the same - they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.

7. Best way to get a man to do something is to suggest he is too old for it.

8. Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.

9. If they put a man on the moon - they should be able to put them all up there.

10. Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone.

11. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in Biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.

12. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him
checkbooks.

13. Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes…it means that you laugh at him.

14. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener!

15. Sadly, all men are created equal.

Mea Culpa (My Mistake)

"Words once spoken can never be retracted,
Missives once sent cannot be redacted,
Hearts once broken will never be whole,
And faith once lost is rarely restored." ~moi

I have always believed that all love that is real is true. Then I discovered, albeit the hard way, that “love” has as many different meanings to just as many different people. I once read that love is just a word until you find someone to give it definition. So, based on some people their "love" is neither true, nor real.

The object of "being in a relationship" is to show the people you love that you do love them. Even cretins (an obtuse, mentally defective person) make some effort on behalf of the one whom they profess to love, yet some people are obviously lower on the evolutionary emotional scale than a cretin.

The icing on the cake, the fait accompli, the mea culpa....ever the romantic soul that I am, I chose to give the debased cretin (lower than your average cretin) the benefit of the doubt. In return I learned very much the hard way that What You Don't Know Will Hurt You....but NOT until You DISCOVER what it is. To say I feel like a complete idiot is an understatement of egregious proportion.

Reality check:

• loving someone doesn’t make them do right, treat you right, nor does it make them a better person; to quote a Jack Johnson lyric, "loving someone don't make them love you..."
  
  
• although I feel like an idiot now, I must always be true to myself. Always.
  
  
• you never get a second chance to do it right the first time.
  
  
• second chances are simply mistakes you keep repeating.
  
  
• I suppose I need a t-shirt or coffee mug that reads "I ♥ Cretins!" or "Jerk Magnet" since it seems to be my modus vivendi (way of life...sad, but true).
  
  
• if loving someone was easy, would it be as highly valued?
  
  
• faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.
  
  
• love is whatever you can still betray; betrayal can only happen if you love.
  
  
• the wounds of a lover are worse than the wounds of an enemy; you expect to be wounded by your enemy.
  
  
• forgiveness is the fragrance a rose sheds on the heel that has crushed it; the final form of love. Francoi de La Rochefoucauld writes, "One forgives to the degree that one loves."
  
  
• being deeply loved by someone gives you strength; loving someone deeply gives you courage.
  
  
• what you don't know will hurt you...but not until you discover what it is; ignorance is not bliss. Ignorance is ignorance, often painful and sometimes lethal in large doses.
  
  
• sometimes the hardest part of the journey is believing you're worthy of the trip.
  
  
• if life and loving was easy...where would all the adventures be?
  
  
• believing is not about seeing, and faith is not about reaching, and on this journey I keep learning that flying is not about wings.~downhere

Laterz,
~Starla